November, 2024 - Mental Inventory

What Does Emotional Safety Mean to You?

When it comes to feeling safe in relationships, it goes beyond physical protection. Emotional safety is another important factor in building healthy relationships. It is about being accepted, validated, and understood. An emotionally safe relationship has open communication, empathy, boundaries, trust, honesty, and vulnerability.

Open Communication

Communication is the foundation of building emotional safety in a relationship. It involves sharing how you feel with one another and being empathetic towards each other. How you communicate in relationships can also impact how safe a relationship is. It is important to speak in a calm and respectful tone. It isn’t just about giving a message. It is about delivering it in a way the other person can receive it. Communication also involves listening to understand and not to defend. It is about recognizing that you won’t agree with everything the person says, but you can be understanding.

Boundaries

Emotionally safe relationships are built on clear boundaries. It’s essential to identify your boundaries and communicate them openly. If there’s a sensitive topic you are not ready to discuss, it’s important to express that you’re not comfortable sharing that information at this time. Another key boundary is ensuring that personal conversations remain private and are not shared outside the relationship without mutual consent. Additionally, avoiding name-calling and personal attacks is crucial to maintaining emotional safety in the relationship.

Trust

When trust is lacking in a relationship, it becomes difficult to establish emotional safety. One of the most important ways to foster a sense of safety is by honoring our commitments to one another. It builds trust and shows that we genuinely care. Another component of trust is honesty. Being open about how you feel is part of building intimacy in relationships. Honesty is also about being transparent. It involves sharing your needs, intentions, and desires. This openness fosters a deeper emotional connection, helping both partners feel heard, understood, and safe.

Accountability

Sometimes, you might hurt the person you love, and being accountable for your words and actions is critical in maintaining emotional safety. It starts with an apology and ends with an agreement to do better. It is also about being able to change any behaviors that might be hurtful. You are not responsible for how someone feels, but you are responsible for your words and actions. Be willing to admit fault and take steps to do better. When you demonstrate a willingness to learn from your mistakes and improve, it deepens trust and strengthens emotional safety.

Vulnerability

Another important step towards emotional security is vulnerability. You want to be open about your feelings, share your needs, and show your imperfections. The benefit of vulnerability is that it allows you to be accepted for who you are. This acceptance fosters a deeper connection. Vulnerability is not easy, and sharing a little information over time is okay. The key is to take it at your own pace, allowing yourself to be vulnerable when you feel safe and ready. Vulnerability is earned over time as trust increases.

Key Takeaways

Emotional safety is just as important as physical safety. Your heart should be handled with care. Emotional safety involves open communication, empathy, boundaries, trust, honesty, and vulnerability. By embodying these qualities, you can build a relationship rooted in love, respect, and support.

What Does Community Mean to You?

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Community can have a profound impact on how you feel in the world. When you have a community of people who support you, you feel more connected to the world around you. It is important to have a community of people who support and accept you so you do not feel alone. You can find community by joining support groups, attending local events, and making time for your interests and values.

Finding Support Groups

When facing life’s challenges, having a supportive community makes a difference. A simple Google search can often be your first step toward finding help. There is a wide range of free resources available through non-profit organizations, online support forums, mental health hotlines, local churches, and community centers. Asking for help takes courage—it may not always be easy, but it is a vital step toward receiving the support you deserve.

Attending Local Events

One of the best ways to feel a sense of community is by joining in on local events. Start by exploring the resources your neighborhood offers. If there’s a community center nearby, consider joining a workshop or class to meet like-minded people. Whether it’s a fitness class, a creative workshop, or a support group, you’ll likely find others with similar interests or experiences. Being involved in your local community can help reduce loneliness and foster a sense of belonging.

Making Time for Your Interest and Values

Another great way to connect with others is through your interests and values. Think about how you can use your passions to meet people who share similar goals. For example, if you’re interested in personal development, you might attend workshops on financial wellness. If fitness is your passion, joining a running group could be a perfect way to find others who share your enthusiasm. Similarly, if your values center around faith, joining a church can connect you with a supportive community. Staying true to your values and interests can help you find people who resonate with who you are.

Remaining Patient and Consistent

Finding the right community might take time and requires putting yourself out there consistently. Don’t be afraid to be selective about the people you connect with. Ultimately, you want to surround yourself with those who accept and appreciate you for who you are.

What Beliefs Are Holding You Back?

When you look at your life, are you happy with where you are? If you answered no, have you ever considered the beliefs that might be holding you back? Limiting beliefs can be detrimental to you achieving your goals and dreams. I want to help you identify common beliefs that may prevent you from having the life you want.

Belief 1: Things Will Never Change

When you get used to things not going your way, it is easy to believe that is how it will always be. You desire change, but you do not believe it is possible. Often, change starts with you. It requires you to change before you can see the change around you. No matter how long things have been a certain way, the possibility for change is always there. Believe that things can change—and that you have the power to make it happen.

Belief 2: I Will Be Happy When….

You might think you’ll be happy when you meet the right person, land that promotion, or buy a house. But what is stopping you from being happy right now? Because external things only play a small percentage in our happiness. The happiness you cultivate from within has a greater impact. There is nothing wrong with wanting more, but I believe it is important to understand that long-term happiness comes from within.

You can experience more happiness by being grateful for what you have right now. You can also increase your happiness by making choices that align with your values, not a particular outcome. Consider what values you want to prioritize more in your life. Instead of depending on external things to make you happy, consider some choices you can make today that will make you happier.

Belief 3: Asking for Help Is a Sign of Weakness

While being ambitious and independent are great qualities, there are times when reaching out for support is necessary. It is okay to ask for help, and it does not make you less capable. When you ask for help, it allows you to learn and grow. By seeking guidance, you gain the support of those who have already achieved what you’re striving for. Instead of seeing help as a weakness, see it as a strength. You recognize you want to grow and are willing to learn from others. That sounds like a strength to me.

Belief 4: I Should Be Further Along

This belief often stems from the regret you have about the past. You might regret not working on a particular goal sooner. Instead of dwelling on the past, learn from it. Recognize that you did your best and be grateful for the opportunity to do better. Each day you have can be another day you can work towards getting to where you want to be. You might believe that you should be further along, but maybe you are exactly where you are meant to be. At this moment, you have a clear sense of where you want to go and can start taking steps to get there.

Belief 5: My Worth Is External

If I asked what makes you worthy, where would your mind go? Does it go to how attractive you are, how many friends you have, the car you drive, the amount of money you make, or your significant other? While these things can add value to your life, they don’t add value to who you are. These are all external things and are subject to change at any moment. Thankfully, your worth is internal and it doesn’t change. You are worthy because you are a living being. As long as you are alive, you will always be worthy.

New Beliefs

Your beliefs shape the way you experience life. If you find that you are not experiencing the life you want, examine your beliefs. Recognize beliefs that may be limiting you and replace them with new beliefs that serve you in a powerful way. You can change your life by changing what you believe about yourself. Here are some new beliefs I hope you can adopt.

I am capable of change
My worth is innate
I am where I am meant to be
I can cultivate happiness from within
Asking for help is a strength

Where Do You Want to Be?

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Reflecting on my life, I feel content with where I am. But I remember a time when I wasn’t. I believed that life would be better if things went my way. Although external circumstances can impact our happiness, they do so only to a small degree. I eventually realized that if I wanted to experience lasting happiness, I needed to take accountability for my choices.

Taking Accountability

I am responsible for where I am. Yes, there were things I could not control, but I was in control of my choices. Avoiding the unknown kept me stuck in what I knew. Not communicating my needs led to unfulfilling relationships. Doubting myself prevented me from taking risks. Holding on to old beliefs hindered my growth. If I wanted better, I had to make better choices.

Making Good Choices

I remember how quitting a toxic job opened the door to a better career. Starting my blog allowed me to live out my purpose. Ending a friendship sparked self-discovery and growth. These choices aligned with the life I wanted to live. I made them because I believed I deserved better.

Changing My Beliefs

I did not always believe I could have what I wanted. I didn’t always believe I was worthy of it. I didn’t always believe I could change. These beliefs led me to make choices that didn’t align with what I wanted. If I wanted to change where I was, I had to make a new choice. If I wanted to make a new choice, I had to change how I saw myself. If I wanted to change how I saw myself, I had to believe I was worthy.

Knowing My Values

I have learned that inner happiness comes from making choices that align with my values. While knowing my values is one thing, living them out in my daily life is another. I’m becoming more accountable for what truly matters to me and now understand which values I need to prioritize. I see how my values are instrumental in guiding me to make better decisions, and I am actively learning to make choices that align with what I value most.

Takeaway

I realized that I have the power to change my life, and it started with being accountable for my choices. Below are questions I have found helpful in evaluating my life and choices. I hope you can recognize how powerful choices are and create a life you are worthy of having.

What choices have I made to get to where I want to be?
What choices can I make to get to where I want to be?
What choices have I made prevent me from getting to where I want to be?
What values do I need to prioritize more in my life?
What beliefs are preventing me from having the life I want?
What beliefs can help me create the life I want?
How well do my choices align with my top values?