How to Reparent Yourself? 

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Your childhood plays a crucial role in shaping who you become as an adult. Your experiences during these years shape your beliefs, behaviors, and self-worth, with your relationship with your parent playing a key role in how you view yourself. Unfortunately, if you didn’t have parents who provided guidance, love, and protection, you may carry unresolved childhood wounds into adulthood. One way to heal these wounds is through the process of reparenting yourself.

Develop Self-Love 

The love that you deserve is not limited to what you received as a child. When you have been emotionally neglected as a child, this can cause you to feel inadequate, insecure, and unlovable. Although this is a false perception, it can be difficult for adults with these wounds to challenge these beliefs. Your parents may have played a role in how you see yourself then, but you play a role in how you see yourself now. You are worthy and deserving of love. 

Be The Parent You Needed 

When you think about your childhood, what was lacking? Was it protection, love, or guidance? Once you have the answer, consider how you can fulfill those needs. For instance, if you lacked protection during childhood, how can you protect yourself in adulthood? This can mean setting boundaries, speaking up for yourself, and surrounding yourself with supportive people. If love from your parents was lacking, consider some self-care practices. If guidance from your parents was lacking, find a mentor, a therapist, or a pastor who can support you. 

Grieve The Parent You Didn’t Have 

The final stage of grief is acceptance, but before you can get here, it is important to process how you feel. How did it feel to be neglected or abandoned as a child? How did it feel to be unprotected by your parents? How did it feel to be invalidated? How did it feel to be unsupported? What emotions are coming up for you? Is it anger, sadness, disguise, or disappointment? Allow yourself to feel those emotions. I would also suggest processing this with a trusted person because grief can be heavy. Allow your inner child to be heard. You deserve to express your pain. You deserve to release the pain you have been carrying around for years. 

Cultivate Healthy Relationships

Healthy relationships are essential to reparenting, as they provide a positive example of how relationships should be. Through these relationships, you realize that your parent’s inability to meet your needs reflects their capacity and not your worth. You were always worthy, even if you did not receive the love you needed as a child. Having positive and supportive people can help you heal your inner child by creating an environment where you feel safe, understood, and worthy of love. Healthy relationships can help you develop new belief systems and patterns of behaviors that serve you in a positive way. You learn that as an adult you have a choice about who you develop a relationship with. You also recognize that building healthy relationships is the catalyst to healing your inner child.

Transformative Journey

In conclusion, reparenting is a transformative process where you take on the role of the supportive, loving parent you may not have had during childhood. You show up for yourself by developing self-love, meeting your needs, processing your emotions, accepting what was and cultivating healthy relationships. Ultimately, reparenting empowers you to become the person you needed growing up. As you become this person, you begin to heal your childhood wounds.

How Solitude Can Be a Gift to You

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Many people fear being alone, but it can often be the greatest gift we can give ourselves. Life can get busy, and having some time to check in with you can be powerful and transformative. There is a chance for growth, healing, creativity, and clarity. I want to help you see how solitude can be a gift to you. 

Solitude has helped me to grow

During this time in my life, I have more time to myself. I have time to self-reflect on my life and identify what is working for me and what is not working for me. This clarity has guided me to make choices that align with my values. I am more clear about what I want and willing to take action to get there. I also recognize what I need to work on and strive to improve. Through self-compassion, I have learned to give myself grace and challenge limiting beliefs. I recognized I had the power to change, and I could take one step at a time. 

Solitude has been healing for me

​The biggest lesson I have learned is that my worth is innate. Often, phrases like these can sound cliché, but it is a truth I am glad I discovered. I once believed my worth depended on others’ opinions and that I had to earn it, but now I know I do not have to work for it. My worth is already there, just waiting to be realized. When you know you are worthy, you feel more confident in who you are. This confidence allows you to pursue the life that you want. 

Solitude has taught me that I deserve to be happy

Once I recognized my worth was innate, I felt more deserving of the life I wanted. As a result, I am more intentional about taking actions that align with my values. I challenge myself when I feel afraid because I know that pushing past the fear will help me get to where I want to be. I am not as hard on myself now because I believe I deserve to be happy. I prioritize my mental health, and I am willing to ask for help because I believe I deserve to be supported. 

Solitude has helped me identify what my needs are

Being aware of my needs has helped me to evaluate my relationships. It made it easier to recognize relationships that no longer served me. It also helped me realize what needs were most important to me. I also learned the role I played in my needs going unmet. I did not communicate my needs consistently and chose people who could not meet my needs. I realized that I deserved to have my needs met and took actions that aligned with this belief. 

Solitude helped me to be more intentional

Once I realized that I was the common denominator in all my relationships, I understood that the change I desired started with me. It began with me identifying my needs, wants, and dealbreakers. This information helped me to evaluate what relationships to pursue. I also recognized the importance of communicating my needs, asking questions, and having shared values. It was no longer enough to enjoy someone’s company. It was about identifying who I am compatible with and creating the foundation for long-lasting relationships.

Solitude taught me to trust myself

I was having a hard time making a decision about a new relationship. I met someone who had great qualities, but there was one dealbreaker.  I knew I wanted to make new friends that were long-lasting and realized that it was best that I did not pursue the friendship. It was a difficult decision at the moment, but in the long run, it was the best decision. I look back on that day and realize that the peace I had in my decision was enough to know I did the right thing. 

Solitude gives me time to be creative

I knew that there was more to life than what I was doing. I always wanted to start a blog but never considered myself creative enough. I decided that I would give it a try, and it has given me so much fulfillment. I enjoy creating content that can make a difference in people’s lives. I still do not consider myself creative, but I may need to challenge that belief. Writing is a creative process, and I take pride in sharing my passion with others.  

The Gifts of Solitude

Solitude can be a gift. I have shared seven with you today. But I hope that by reading this, you can discover the gifts solitude has given you. To recap, here are the seven gifts of solitude I have found in my life. 

  1. The gift of growth 
  2. The gift of healing 
  3. The gift of happiness 
  4. The gift of knowledge 
  5. The gift of clarity 
  6. The gift of trust 
  7. The gift of creativity 

The next time you are alone, I hope you can see it as a gift.

What Ways do You Self-Sabotage?

We all have dreams and goals that we want to achieve, but what if I told you the only person standing in between what you want is YOU. Self-sabotage is a common reason people don’t have the life they want. They find ways to sabotage what they desire. I want to help you identify ways you self-sabotage and help you to make choices that align with your values.

Signs of Self-Sabotage

Self-sabotage behavior refers to intentional action (or inaction) that undermines people’s progress and prevents them from accomplishing their goals. Some signs of self-sabotage include:

  • Procrastination
  • Perfectionism
  • Not asking for help
  • Being inconsistent
  • Giving up prematurely
  • Not taking risks
  • Making excuses
  • Comparing yourself to others
  • Limiting beliefs
  • Ignoring red flags

Become Self-Aware

The purpose of creating this list is not to beat yourself up but to create awareness around your behaviors. You want to make sure your actions match what you desire. The first step is to recognize what behaviors contradict what you want. If you want a healthy relationship, consider ways your beliefs or behaviors undermine it. Do you ignore red flags? Do you make excuses for not putting yourself out there? Or do you believe you are unworthy of love? These questions can bring awareness to ways you self-sabotage.

Reasons You Self-Sabotage

Now that you can identify ways you self-sabotage, you might wonder why you do it. Here are some common reasons:

1. It Is Familiar

One reason we hold ourselves back is because it is familiar. For example, if you experience emotional neglect from your parents, you might find yourself drawn to emotionally unavailable people. You may want to be in a healthy relationship but ignore red flags. Your desire does not align with your action, and this is an example of self-sabotage.

2. Low Self-Esteem

Another reason people self-sabotage is because of low self-esteem. When you grow up as a child not getting your needs met, you might develop beliefs that you are not enough, there is something wrong with you, you can’t trust people, and you are unworthy of love. Although these beliefs are untrue, many people struggle to challenge them. When you do not challenge these beliefs, you allow them to get in the way of what you want.

3. Fear of Failure 

Failure is only temporary when you do not give up. The fear of failure can hinder you from going after what you want. Perhaps you are eager to launch a business, yet anxiety holds you back. Or you want to go back to school for an advanced degree but dread the difficulty of the coursework. Avoiding challenges and shying away from risks is often a sign you are afraid to fail.

4. Perfectionism

Self-sabotage is often rooted in perfectionism. One sign that perfectionism may be an obstacle is the mindset of all-or-nothing thinking, where you believe there is only failure and success. This perspective leads to setting unrealistic expectations for yourself, which can hinder your ability to achieve your goals.

Make A Change 

When you become aware, you have the power to change. Self-sabotage no longer has to get in the way of the dreams and goals you have for yourself. You can make choices that align with your values. It is not enough to want something. You must be willing to take action to get there. Consider the following questions:

  • What actions can I take to support my goals and desires? 
  • What patterns of behaviors are preventing me from succeeding? 
  • What beliefs do I need to challenge to feel worthy of success? 
  • What values do I need to prioritize more in my life? 
  • What is one choice I can make to achieve my goals?
  • What progress have I made to achieve my goals?

These questions can keep you in alignment with what you want. 

In Summary

Self-sabotage is a common way we hold ourselves back, but the good news is that you can shift. You can make a change and have what you want. It starts with you. Believe you are worthy of what you want and make choices that align with your values. 

Why Do You Settle for Less?

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If you believe you deserve everything you desire, why settle? People often settle due to fear, a scarcity mindset, low self-esteem, and the desire for instant gratification. Instead of settling, know that you are worthy of having what you want, have faith that what you want is possible, take action to get what you want, and wait for what you want to show up.

Fear of Change

One of the reasons that people settle is because of fear. Some people stay in relationships that are unhealthy because they are afraid of being alone. Some people remain at unfulfilling jobs because they are afraid of uncertainty. Some people do not follow their dreams because they are scared of failing. It is natural to fear change. But change is often needed to get to where you want to be. Instead of being afraid, have faith that what you want is possible. You can have better relationships. You can have a job that you love. You can fulfill your dreams.

Scarcity Mindset

A scarcity mindset might be another reason people settle. You might believe having something is better than having nothing. Settling for less than what you deserve only reinforces the belief that you are not worthy of what you want. Self-limiting beliefs prevent us from having what we want. It can also lead to disappointment and regret. Rather than having a scarcity mindset, develop an abundance mindset. There are enough opportunities to go around. No one can take away what belongs to you. If it is for you, you will receive it.

Low Self-Esteem

Another reason that people settle is because of low self-esteem. When someone has low self-esteem, they don’t believe they can have what they want. Subsequently, they accept less than they deserve because of their low self-worth. Your self-worth is innate. You are a human being, and that alone makes you worthy. Whether they are goals, dreams, relationships, or opportunities, remember that you are worthy of what you desire. Once you know you are worthy, have the patience to wait for what you want instead of accepting whatever shows up.

Instant Gratification

Instant gratification is another reason people settle. It might initially feel great to settle for a casual relationship instead of waiting for a deeper connection. It may initially feel great to stay at a job you are comfortable at instead of starting your own business. It may initially feel great to splurge on shopping instead of saving for a down payment on a house. The problem with instant gratification is that it only fulfills you in the short term. Instead, consider delayed gratification. Be willing to make decisions that are hard in the short term but pay off in the long run. It might take longer to fulfill a particular desire, but it is often worth the time and effort.

Final Thoughts

You might have a dream that you have been thinking about pursuing or desire for a fulfilling relationship. Whatever you want, know that you are worthy of having it, have faith that what you want is possible, take action, and wait for what you want to show up. Do not give into fear or impatience while pursuing your desires. What is for you is coming, and it is worth the wait.

When Do You Trust Your Gut?

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You might be familiar with the saying, “Trust your intuition; it never lies.” However, some people may not recognize when their intuition is speaking or might hesitate to follow their gut. While having a strong sense of intuition is beneficial, trusting it can be challenging for some. To build that trust, focus on listening to your body, relying on your judgment, reflecting on past experiences, and following your instincts.

Listening to Your Body

One way to trust your intuition is by learning how it speaks to you. Intuition can speak through physical sensations. It can be a peace you feel when you are around the right person. Or it can be a sinking feeling in your stomach when something feels off. Other common physical sensations include tightness in your chest or goosebumps. When you recognize how intuition speaks to you, it is important to listen to it. Take time to scan your body for physical sensations so that you can identify the subtle cues your intuition is telling you. 

Unlocking Your Intuition

You may not feel comfortable trusting your intuition because it does not make logical sense. But intuition stems from the subconscious mind, not the conscious mind. People commonly rationalize a situation because they are afraid of trusting their gut. Or allow anxiety to cause them to overthink and overpower their inner knowledge. You may have dated someone who seems perfect on paper but did not feel at ease about moving forward with them. You might have reasoned with yourself by saying I don’t have a solid reason not to be with this person. But when you decide to give them a chance, you discover they are not a good fit for you.

Following Your Intuition

You may be able to recall a time you had a gut feeling about something but went against it. Our intuition usually comes with an inner knowing, but we don’t always follow it. It can also be a hesitation about something or someone. Or it can be a thought that comes out of nowhere. Reflecting on past experiences can help you identify how your intuition speaks to you and understand the value of following it. You may have accepted a job offer you were hesitant about and soon discover the work environment is toxic. In this situation, you recognize that trusting your gut could have prevented you from being in this situation. Instead of being hard on yourself, use this experience as a reason to follow your intuition.

While you may not always trust your gut, when you do, it often leads you to where you want to be. You may have trusted your gut to start your own business, and now you have a more fulfilling career. You might have felt a sense of inner peace about someone after your first date, and then two years later, you are married to them. Your intuition never lies, but anxiety can. It is crucial to distinguish between anxiety and intuition. Intuition is a clear message, while anxiety is a fear of the unknown.

Intuition can be challenging for some to identify or even trust. But there are ways that you can begin to trust your intuition. The way to do this is by listening to your body, trusting your judgment, reflecting on experiences, and following your intuition. As your trust in your intuition grows, you’ll discover that you make decisions with increased confidence and clarity.

What Are Your Expectations?

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Expectations in a relationship can often lead to resentment when they go unmet. It is important to know how to manage our expectations to prevent us from feeling disappointed or resentful towards the people we are in relationships with. Instead, we can evaluate our expectations, communicate our needs, recognize people’s limitations, make agreements, let go of our expectations, and move towards what we want. 

Understand the Origins of Expectations

Managing our expectations can begin by understanding their origins. Many expectations arise from societal or familial influences. Others may stem from personal experiences. Recognizing the source of our expectations helps us assess how reasonable they are. Expecting respect, honesty, and support in relationships is reasonable. However, anticipating others to fulfill unexpressed needs is not. It’s also worth considering the flexibility of our expectations: are they negotiable or dealbreakers?

Communicate Your Needs

Resentment often arises from unmet expectations. It’s crucial to communicate our needs clearly to have them met, as others cannot provide what they are unaware we require. We may assume or expect others to know our needs, but rather than placing the burden on them, we should express our needs directly. Sharing the significance of these needs and how their fulfillment would impact us can be beneficial. By doing so, we can form agreements with others by requesting what we need and giving them the choice to agree.

Although we can express our needs to others, we cannot control whether the other person meets them. Everyone has limitations that might prevent them from fulfilling the needs of those they care about. A common barrier is a lack of awareness or understanding. If someone doesn’t know about your needs or how to satisfy them, consider providing specific ways that need can be met. Additionally, personal issues such as unresolved trauma can hinder someone’s ability to meet your needs until they have addressed their own.

Accept What You Cannot Change

Sometimes, improving our relationships involves letting go of our expectations of who we want someone to be and accepting them as they are. A single person may not fulfill all our needs, but do they satisfy most of our needs? Whether their inability to meet certain needs is a dealbreaker is up to you to determine. It’s about deciding what you’re willing to compromise on and what you’re not. This process often leads to the realization that the person may not be the best fit for you. Rather than expecting someone to fit your needs, it might be worth finding people capable of meeting your needs.

Know When to Move On

There may come a time when you decide to move on to fulfill your needs. We often expect our friend or significant other to meet these needs, but they may be unable or unwilling to do so. If communication has occurred and your needs remain unmet, this may indicate it’s time to end the relationship. Sometimes, letting go is in your best interest. We all deserve to have our needs met, and being open to letting go of unfulfilling relationships can lead you closer to what you desire. It opens the door for connections with those who can meet your needs.

Managing expectations is crucial because unmet expectations can result in disappointment. We can do this by evaluating our expectations, communicating our needs, recognizing people’s limitations, making agreements, letting go of our expectations, and moving towards what we want. We are all worth having our needs met. 

What is Emotional Intelligence?

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Emotional intelligence is a great skill to have. We can increase our emotional intelligence by understanding ourselves and others. Individuals with high levels of emotional intelligence have these five components: empathy, social skills, self-awareness, self-regulation, and motivation. These attributes often play a crucial role in fostering better relationships and enhancing overall well-being.

Understanding Empathy

Empathy is one of the components of emotional intelligence. It is the ability to understand the emotions and perspectives of others. We can exercise our empathy by listening to understand and not to respond. After they share their feelings or thoughts, repeat to them what you heard. Start your response with I heard you say and ask them if you heard them correctly. Often, you may not agree with their perspective. However, empathy is about seeking to understand. You may not have the same perspective, but putting yourself in their shoes makes it easier to understand their point of view.

Enhancing Social Skills

Social skills are another vital component of emotional intelligence. The way we communicate verbally and nonverbally shows our level of emotional intelligence. Non-verbal cues like eye contact, body language, and tone of voice are things to consider when communicating. Maintaining eye contact and open body language is a great way to create an environment for open communication. Social skills also encompass active listening. Listen to understand and ask open-ended questions to gain a better understanding. You want to not only be able to communicate your point but also hear the other person’s perspective.

Cultivating Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is an essential part of emotional intelligence. It is the ability to understand your thoughts, behaviors, and emotions. It is also recognizing how our words and behaviors impact others. Self-awareness can be developed by asking for feedback. Often, we are not able to see what other people see. Feedback from others can give us insight into how we are perceived. Some feedback may not be easy to receive, but remaining open to it creates an opportunity to grow. You can also develop self-awareness through journaling, mindfulness, and self-reflection.

Mastering Self-Regulation

Self-regulation is at the heart of emotional intelligence. Some emotions may be more challenging, but knowing how to manage all emotions is a crucial part of self-regulation. Accepting how you feel can allow you to process your emotions. Reframe from judging your feelings. Instead, view your emotions as information and separate from who you are. Instead of saying I am sad. Say I am feeling sad, or I am experiencing sadness. It is also okay to take a break if your emotions become too intense or talk through emotions with a supportive friend.

Fostering Intrinsic Motivation

Intrinsic motivation is the final component of emotional intelligence. It refers to the internal desire to pursue activities or goals for enjoyment rather than external rewards. Intrinsic motivation has three key elements: autonomy, mastery, and purpose. Self-motivation allows you to take initiative and find fulfillment in acquiring new knowledge. It also fosters personal growth, which can lead to self-actualization. You can increase motivation by celebrating small victories, setting clear goals, and finding purposeful work.

Emotional intelligence is a valuable skill that enhances well-being and fosters connections with the world. It comprises five components: empathy, social skills, self-awareness, self-regulation, and motivation. Consider these components as you work to improve your emotional intelligence.

What is Your Purpose?

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Many individuals grapple with the question, “What is my purpose?” However, finding the answer can make life more fulfilling. You can discover your purpose by asking questions like Who am I? What are my strengths? What motivates me? What do I enjoy? Who inspires me? Answering these can guide you to the ultimate question: What is my purpose?

Step 1: Know Yourself

Knowing who you are is the first step to uncovering your purpose. When you know who you are, you know who you were born to be. I intentionally say be because your purpose is not about doing but rather being. Who you are goes beyond a role or occupation. It is about understanding what your values are. Identifying your top five values is a great starting point. When you know what you value, you can find your purpose more easily. Values give direction that leads you to where you want to be. 

Step 2: Identify Your Strengths

Another way to discover your purpose is by identifying your strengths. Whether big or small, your strengths can make a difference in the world. Take time to list your strengths and ask yourself how you can use these strengths to create purpose in your life. My strengths are my curiosity and compassion for others. I enjoy learning and sharing knowledge with others. Blogging has enabled me to leverage my strengths to create a positive impact. When we find enjoyment in doing the things we are good at, we can cultivate purpose. 

Step 3: Understand Your Motivations

We are all motivated by something, and understanding what drives you can lead you to take actions that align with your purpose. Reflecting on what brings you sadness or joy can also shed light on where your motivations are rooted. If injustice saddens you, perhaps advocacy for others could be your calling. Or maybe you feel happy giving back and find purpose in philanthropy.

Step 4: Find Inspiration in Role Models

Sometimes, your purpose reveals itself through inspiration. The people you admire can often help you realize who you want to be. I saw who I could be through Maya Angelou. I saw a woman with resilience, grace, wisdom, and confidence. I wanted to be the phenomenal woman she wrote about in her poem. She helped me to discover my purpose by living out her purpose. Having role models allows you to envision what is possible for yourself. Consider the people who inspire you and ask yourself what qualities resonate with you the most, and how can you find purpose in embodying these same qualities?

Unlocking Your Purpose

Everyone has a purpose, though finding it can be a challenge. Fortunately, the key to uncovering your purpose lies within. By gaining insight into your identity, recognizing your strengths, understanding your motivations, embracing what brings you joy, and identifying who inspires you, you can unlock the path to your purpose. Remember, your purpose lies in being you. 

Where Does Your Perfectionism Stem from?

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One personal challenge for me is perfectionism. The first time I was conscious of my perfectionism was in college. My friend was sitting next to me as I took notes. I had a habit of rewriting my notes to make them look perfect. My friend noticed I was about to erase something I had written and stopped me. I felt challenged, but it helped me understand things don’t always need to be perfect. We can overcome perfectionism by identifying the cause, challenging all-or-nothing thinking, focusing on progress, practicing self-compassion, and letting go of comparison.

Identifying the Root Cause

The first step to resolving a problem is identifying the cause of it. I remember my early childhood when my aunt would review my homework and mark all my mistakes with a red pen. It helped me to become more diligent, but it also led to me becoming a perfectionist. Even if there were a few errors, I would have to rewrite the whole thing. I internalized this experience and believed that my best wasn’t good enough. In college, I found myself rewriting notes not for study purposes but for visual appeal. I realized I was repeating a behavior I had learned from my aunt.

Letting Go of Comparisons

The way we can overcome perfectionism is by not comparing ourselves to others. Letting go of comparisons eliminates the need to measure up to another person’s standard. I would rewrite my notes because I wanted them like one of my classmates. One of my classmates had beautiful penmanship and color-coordinated her notes in different colors. I didn’t trust that my standard was good enough, so I created a standard that I believed was better. I wanted my notes to look aesthetically pleasing so it would take longer to make notes.

Shifting Focus from Perfection to Progress

Perfectionism often slows you down. Every time I rewrote my notes, it took time away from studying. The best way to deal with perfectionism is by focusing on making progress. I had to shift from focusing on the aesthetic of notes to creating notes that helped me understand the material of a class. I challenged the all-or-nothing thinking that only perfection was acceptable. Through self-compassion, I recognize that I am unique and my best is enough. I learned to accept myself as is and not strive to be worthy through perfection but recognize I am already worthy.

Embracing Your Worth

I may have recognized my perfectionism in college, but it started in childhood. Often, we need to revisit our early childhood experiences to identify behaviors we need to unlearn. The first step to overcoming perfectionism is to identify the root cause. Then, we can challenge our beliefs through self-compassion. Instead of focusing on perfection, we shift to progress. Lastly, we unlearn the belief that we are not good enough by not comparing ourselves to others. Our worth lies in who you are, not in who you think you should be. I hope your takeaway is that you don’t need to be perfect to be enough. You are enough as you are.

How Mentally Strong Are You?

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There is a popular book called 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do by Amy Morin. I found this list to help me focus on ways I can become more mentally strong, and I hope that sharing it will have the same impact on you. Here are thirteen behaviors that mentally strong people avoid. By avoiding these behaviors, you can feel more in control of your life no matter what is going on externally.

They Don’t Engage in Self-Pity

Feeling sad over a painful experience is natural, yet wallowing in self-pity can strip us of our power. Life inevitably has pain, but our reaction to it is a choice. Choose self-compassion over self-pity. Acknowledge your pain, but don’t let it become your identity.

They Don’t Live in the Past

Clinging to pain hinders progress. Focusing on the lessons learned allows us to move beyond the hurt. Gaining wisdom from past experiences can help us to make better choices for the future.

They Don’t Give Their Power Away

Blaming others for your emotions gives away your power. It’s up to you to regulate your feelings. By owning your emotions, you empower yourself.

They Don’t People Please

People pleasing is often a sign of poor boundaries and a defense mechanism to keep people from being upset. Consider saying no to things you don’t want to do.

They Don’t Focus on Things They Can’t Control

Although there are many things you cannot change, there are things that you can change and even influence. Focusing more on what you can change empowers you to take action.

They Don’t Fear Alone Time

Solitude offers a valuable opportunity for personal growth. Taking time to be alone with our thoughts enables us to reflect on our feelings and achieve greater clarity. Adopting a self-care practice such as journaling can be a great way to monitor your thoughts and emotions.

They Don’t Avoid Change

Change can often be challenging, but embracing it allows us to grow. Moments of discomfort can lead us to the best version of ourselves.

They Don’t Avoid Taking Risks

Fear can often prevent us from taking risks. Although scary, a risk can lead to a great reward. Consider taking small risks to get more comfortable with big risks.

They Don’t Make the Same Mistakes

Part of being human is making mistakes. Mistakes do not define us. They are opportunities to learn what we can do differently.

They Don’t Rely on Instant Gratification

It is common to have goals, but it takes time to achieve them. Instead of focusing on the outcome, enjoy the process. Put forth your best effort and remain patient. 

They Don’t Feel Entitled

When we have the belief that the world owes us, we run the risk of being disappointed. Develop an internal locus of control. Consider the actions you can take to achieve your goals.

They Don’t Envy People’s Sucess

Jealousy is a natural emotion, yet it can become harmful without self-awareness. Rather than feeling threatened by another’s achievements, let them inspire you. The success of others can serve as a motivation for what you can achieve.

They Don’t Give Up Easily

Failure is only permanent when we give up. When we push through setbacks, we pave the way to success.