Friendships are some of the most important relationships we will ever have. They often give us a sense of belonging and a safe space to be ourselves. Friendships can be deeply intimate, with some describing their friends as soulmates or family. When you think about the friends you have in your life, what qualities do you value in those relationships? It’s probably their honesty, reliability, or loyalty. Now, think about the values you bring to a friendship. You not only want a friend of value. You want to be a friend of value.
Friendship Is a Two-Way Street
How are you showing up in your friendships? A lack of balance in a relationship is the quickest way to build resentment. If you have a friend who is constantly cancelling plans and you are the only one initiating plans, this could create some imbalance. In these situations, be comfortable communicating your needs and expressing how you feel. If it bothers you that your friend isn’t showing up for you, let them know. Or if you haven’t been able to show up for your friend, be transparent about why. The key to having a healthy conversation is to be open, honest, curious, and respectful. With open communication, you are creating space for mutual understanding.
No Friend Is Perfect
There is no such thing as a perfect friend. You have imperfections, and so will your friends. What makes a friendship valuable is acceptance. You can be yourself without judgment. Likewise, accepting who your friends are is part of being a friend. Be friends with people you accept, and be friends with people that accept you. You might not agree with everything your friends do or say, but can you accept your differences? Sometimes, your differences are simply dealbreakers, and it’s important to recognize this. True acceptance means embracing all of who they are, not just the parts you like.
Spend Time with Friends
The quality of your life is directly impacted by the quality of your relationship. While everyone has different social needs, everyone wants to feel connected. It is difficult to maintain connections without spending quality time together. Making time for your friends isn’t just about having fun; it’s about checking in. There is value in laughter and vulnerability. The great thing about meaningful friendship is the support you receive. Life has its challenges, and having someone who supports you during difficult times is priceless.
Inspiration in Friendship
You become the people you spend the most time with. This statement doesn’t mean you lose yourself, but it does show the level of influence friendships can have on you. When you think about your friendships, what inspires you about them? This question is important because you want to make sure that your friendships are influencing you in positive ways. It isn’t about having perfect friends but having admiration for each other. Simply spending time with a patient friend won’t necessarily make you patient. But maybe they can show you how to be more patient. A friend who inspires you is a friend who helps you to learn and grow as a person.
Choose Your Friends Wisely
The wonderful thing about friendship is that you choose them. Create a list of qualities that make a valuable friend. Now, create another list of qualities that make you a valuable friend. Before you can have a friend, be a friend. Create a space for acceptance, honesty, and open communication. Be friends with people whom you appreciate and admire. Lastly, spend time together.