Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. I find myself stuck in the past, and I recognize that it is a sign of unhealed trauma. I told myself stories that exacerbated the pain. I realize that I have the power to change the storyline. I can write a story with a good ending. I can write a motivational story. I can choose a theme of resilience. I can work on character development. I could even have a co-writer. I recognize that to heal meant changing the way I write my story.
The Story
I believe holding onto a story gave me a false sense of safety. I felt safe thinking that people could hurt me. It made it easier to keep my guard up. But what I wanted more than anything was to receive love. How can someone receive love if their heart isn’t open? I tell myself that I can’t trust people. I told myself that I would be disappointed. I convinced myself that there was something wrong with me. The theme of my story was powerless. The title was “I am scared!”
A New Story
I personalized negative experiences because of unresolved trauma. I did not recognize that I had the power to change. I also believed that change was too hard. That is when having a co-writer helped me to change my story. I started by opening up about how I felt and allowing positive and supportive people to help me reframe my story. On my own, I could not write another story, but with the help of another person, I could write a story of resilience, power, love, and hope.
Character Development
My story needed character development. I was a victim of trauma and could not see myself outside that role. I became a victim of my circumstances. Now, I was becoming a victim of my story. Although life had improved, I still held onto painful experiences. I recognized that I needed to change how I saw myself. I began to tap into my power. It was not easy. I knew that the story I used to tell myself did not serve me anymore. I changed my story to “I got through it.” “Because I got through it, I can now have better.”
Edits
Like a book, there are still things that need editing. I am still working on letting go of the past. My story now is that I am on my way. I have come so far. I can look forward to what is to come. The themes of my story are power, resilience, love, and hope. The title is The Power in Me.