How Do You Process Sadness?  

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Sadness is a feeling that many people find uncomfortable to experience. It is known as one of the negative emotions we have as human beings. But sadness is just an emotion. Sure, it is uncomfortable, but it serves a purpose. I am learning that sadness can remind me of what I need and want. When processing an emotion like sadness, it is helpful to acknowledge sadness, identify the cause, reframe your perspective, practice gratitude, focus on your values, and get support. 

Allow Yourself to Feel Sad

Sadness can feel so uncomfortable that you might want to avoid it. I will admit I don’t like to feel sad, but I realize that it is an emotion that serves a function. When I feel sad, I recognize that it can be a reminder of what matters to me. One of the first things you can do to self-regulate your emotions is to acknowledge them. You might judge an emotion like sadness as negative. The judgment you have about certain emotions may prevent you from processing them. Instead, see emotions as an opportunity to gain insight. Emotions are also temporary. Once you get the information you need, you can allow it to serve you.

Give Context to Your Sadness

One of the most common reasons people feel sad is because of loneliness. I recognize that the sadness I was experiencing was reminding me that I needed to prioritize social connections. When processing sadness, it is helpful to identify experiences that may be causing this feeling. Other common reasons people feel sad are due to a breakup, the death of a loved one, job loss, or life changes. Consider journaling your feelings and the reasons behind them.

Reframe Your Perspective

The way you think affects the way you feel. You can change how you feel by asking yourself what is another way I can see this? You might be sad about a recent breakup, but have you considered the lessons you learned from the relationship? You can take what you learn into your new relationship and create an even better experience. It is also important to recognize how you feel is temporary. You feel sad right now. Adding right now to the end of this sentence can help you recognize that it is not permanent. You can take action to change how you feel. 

Focus on Your Values 

Sadness can remind you what you need and want more of in life. For example, feeling sad about the end of a relationship can remind you that you value meaningful connections. You can find ways to get this value met by taking actions that help you to build meaningful connections. Consider joining clubs or activities that interest you, attending social events, and spending time with friends and family.

Practice Gratitude 

Practicing gratitude is another way you can change your perspective. Write down 5-10 things you are grateful for. This practice can foster a more positive outlook, which can help you feel better. By shifting your attention to something positive, you are changing your focus. When you change your focus to something more positive, you feel more empowered to take action to fix what is causing you sadness.

Get Support

If you’re struggling, reach out to family and friends for support. Although you feel alone, you are not alone. People want to support you. Admitting when you feel sad allows others to help you. If you notice your sadness persists for longer than two weeks, it might be time to seek professional help from a therapist.

Final Takeaway

Sadness is an emotion that may not be easy to process. However, it is an emotion that serves as a function to guide you back to what you need. If you want this guidance, be willing to sit in the discomfort. It might be hard, but acknowledge your sadness. Next, write down what is causing you sadness. Then, reframe your perspective. You can do this by focusing on the lessons and practicing gratitude. Last but not least, reach out for support. You are not alone, and there is help available for you. 

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