While I enjoy watching dating shows for entertainment, I’ve learned to also watch for relationship advice. One piece of advice I liked came from Married at First Sight, where the concept of “growing in love” was introduced. It made me realize that love isn’t something you fall into; it’s something you can grow into. This advice is just one of many lessons I’ve picked up from dating shows, and I’d love to share more of these insights with you.
Grow in Love
The concept of growing in love was new to me. I had never heard that phrase before. I have always heard that you fall in love as if love is something that happened unintentionally. But hearing that I can grow into love helped me to see that love can be intentional. I value the intentionality of loving someone as a conscious choice. Love is not just a feeling; it is an action. Unlike falling in love, I can choose to love someone through my actions. I can grow in love by committing to journey through life with someone who fits where I am going.
Be Interested not Interesting
When it comes to dating, even I worry about if the person will like me. If you focus on being interesting and not interested, it can prevent you from being yourself. Authenticity is what makes you attractive to the right person. If who you are does not interest someone, they might not be the right match for you. Rather than trying to be interesting, focus on being interested. Be yourself and get to know the person to see if you’re interested. By showing genuine interest, you are more likely to find your match not just because they like you but because you like them.
Show Vulnerability
One important part of a relationship is intimacy. It often requires vulnerability to build a close connection with someone. When you can share your weaknesses, your emotions, hopes, and dreams, this creates a deep connection. Vulnerability is not something that you rush. It is something that you can build over time.
Trust is vital to building vulnerability in relationships. When it comes to opening up, start small. Take note of how the person responds. Are they accepting and understanding? Do they offer support or show empathy? Do they respect your boundaries? Are they patient with you? If they answer yes to these questions, this is a huge indication of a trustworthy person.
Know What You Want
Before you reach a destination, you need to know how to get there. Knowing what you want is like having good direction. It can help guide you to the right person. A practical approach is to list your wants, needs, and dealbreakers. When you have this list, you can use it to pick more intentionally. Often, in the early stages of dating, you might experience so much excitement that you forget what you need and want. Dating involves more than just following a checklist; it’s about having something concrete to refer to when feelings run high.
Find Someone You Can Fully Accept
When choosing a partner, it is essential to consider whether you can fully accept them as they are. Can this person meet your needs? Fit into your life? Align with your values?
A common mistake in dating is investing in someone who can not fulfill your needs or wants. Unmet needs often result in a lack of fulfillment, while unmet expectations can lead to resentment. Before committing, take time to assess your compatibility. Do they share your core values? Does their vision align with your dreams?
Trust Your Gut
When it comes to choosing your person, trust yourself. There is peace that you have when you meet the right person. You have a calmness in their presence. You feel safe when you are around them. More importantly, you feel at home.
To Conclude
If you are anything like me and enjoy dating shows, I hope you find one that gives good advice. If not, I hope this blog post helps you learn more about dating and being in a relationship. To recap, here are the five tips for dating and relationships:
Grow in love
Be interested, not interesting
Show vulnerability
Know what you want
Find someone you can fully accept
Trust your gut